Break-ups can be messy, and sometimes even though the relationship has ended, you want your boyfriend to miss you. This, of course, ultimately means that you want to get back together with him. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t even be bothered enough to care where he is, or what he’s doing, or are you even on his mind or not.
If you eventually want to get him back with you, it’s not just enough for him to miss you. It takes a lot more than that for him to come back, and this time, stay for good. You need to make sure that you’re on his mind most of the time. You need to make sure that he’s craving your presence.
Now, how exactly do you do that? There’s no one specific way to ensure that he misses you. Different things work for different people depending on the type of person in question and the kind of nature your ex possesses. Before you actually make up your mind on what exactly you need to do, take some time out to go through what might work on him depending on your past interactions with them.
Give Him Time To Miss You
Zero contact rule. No SMS, phone calls, Facebook… nada.
Do not expect him to miss you if you are keeping an open channel with him. That’s not going to work, trust me.
When a relationship ends, everything ends, especially contacts between you two. And obviously, the last thing you want to do is to show him that you are checking on him. Unless you want to feed his ego 🙂
The best thing to do is to give him and yourself some space. Give yourself time to think and heal from the breakup.
Who knows, you might even decide after couples days/weeks that breaking up was, in fact, the best decision for both of you.
Also, if he has some time away from you, he will reflect on the relationship, and he may be more willing to get back together after he has had time and space to miss you.
You might want to remove his number from your phone so you don’t get tempted to call or text him.
If he’s the one keeping the contact going, let him know that he must stop, that you need time to heal. He should respect that.
Mysteriously Disappear from His Life
Make yourself scarce on all social media (for him), block him from all your social networks and don’t ever even think of messaging or calling him. What this eventually does is it builds up suspense and makes him actually concerned as to where you may have disappeared. He’ll feel unwanted and apprehensive thinking how little he meant to you.
This will make him miss you and will make him want to get in touch with you himself, especially if you guys were so much into each other that you spent a major chunk of the day together.
Be a Social Butterfly and Post on Social Media
Meet new people and socialize with them. Get the message across to your ex that you’re happy without him and don’t need him. This will make him feel like he’s lost something really precious and needs to get it back.
He’ll feel that perhaps he was in the wrong, which is why you got over him so quickly. He’ll also feel that he needed you way more than you needed him.
Get Out and be Active
Another Great way to heal after a breakup is to get a life.
Join a health club, take up swimming or tennis, start running or maybe even rowing. When you start making yourself and your health your first priority, he’ll know that your focus has changed and you have now become more focused on yourself. This will make him insecure and will make him feel heavy about what he has lost.
Get a New Look
When you get a new look, like a new piercing, a new haircut or a completely new hair color altogether, he’ll feel that you have moved on and are now exploring new things in life. This will make him insecure and would want to get back to you.
Take Care of Yourself
If you’re looking for more tips on how to make him miss you, your first and foremost goal after a breakup is to get yourself together.
Who wants to get back together with a whining and crying ex-girlfriend? I know I wouldn’t. So the time for tears is over, now it is time to get up and rise above sadness!
Use this time that you’re not talking to your ex to get back to yourself.
Maybe you have friends that you have put aside for months to go out with your boyfriend.
So now is the perfect time to reconnect with those friends.
They will be there for you emotionally in your time of need, and if they don’t, you always have a family.
If you had mutual friends and the breakup has put a dent in your social circle, go out and make new friends! Attend mixers and happy hours and be open to new friendships.
Become Good Friends with His Mutual Friends
When you start getting very comfortable and cozy with mutual friends, that’s when it will take a toll on him. He’ll become insecure and will feel that his friends might start forming a bad opinion about him. He will start missing all your hangouts together and will want to get back out of the fear of social isolation.
Go to the Kind of Movies You Guys Watched Together
If you both watched movies together and specifically enjoyed that time, you could go to those movies and show him that you can pretty much do all of that alone and he’s the one who’s missing out. That will make him miss all those times and miss you too.
Travel the World
Travel to all the places on your bucket list. This will show your ex that you know how to enjoy your life and live it to the fullest, with or without him. This will make him feel that he’s missing out on so much and has lost someone who was a free soul.
The moment he feels he’s made a mistake is the moment you have won. Make sure you post all of this on your social media.
Boost Your Health
Now more than ever, it’s important to take care of your health. Realize that your body is vulnerable right now, and you may be more prone to getting sick.
Scientific research has shown that after couples split up, people very often become stressed and demoralized, especially after a long relationship. which can have a serious negative impact on the immune system.
Think about it: you became so used to having your partner around, especially if you lived together or just spent a lot of time together. Now that he’s gone, everything feels out of sync. You can’t sleep without him next to you. Your body temperature might even be going wonky. All of this is normal, but you need to really take care of your health right now.
So while you don’t want to spend all your time on the couch feeling sorry for yourself, you also don’t want to overbook yourself going out, taxing your immune system. Find the balance. If you start to feel run down, cancel your plans for the night and take a nice hot bath.
So, treat your body properly. My personal suggestion for that? Sport! it is well known that sport has very good effects on the mind and body.
Do All Those Things That You Had Planned to Do with Your Ex
If the two of you had planned on trying bungee jumping together, or paraglide together, or learn any new skill like playing the guitar together, then do that yourself without him.
This will make him understand that there’s nothing that is going to stop you from doing what you had planned. He’ll have the fear of missing out majorly and will start missing all those times where you had all that crazy fun together.
Get a New Hobby
This could be anything from painting, writing, photography, gardening, knitting, drawing, dancing, basically, anything that you like to do. This will make him feel that he was not the only thing that you had to your life and that there is much more that you can and would like to do with your life.
Dive into Your Work
When you shift your focus elsewhere and make something else the goal of your life altogether, your ex will start feeling insecure. When he’ll know that you’re all set to become an independent woman and aren’t dependent on him in any physical or emotional way, he would want to get back to you for good.
You need to make sure he knows you’re a keeper
Another way to have some distance between you and your ex in this critical No Contact period is to unfollow your ex on social media. Why? Because we know that if you’re following him, you’ll be more attached to stalking him er, keeping tabs on what he’s doing. You may be thrown into tears if you see him posing in a photo with another woman (who actually turns out to be a cousin). It’s not healthy.
Just because you unfollow him doesn’t mean he’ll unfollow you, especially on sites like Twitter and Instagram, so be aware of what you’re posting. Do you think a steady stream of why did he leave me? Woe is me! will make your ex-boyfriend miss you? Nah. He’ll probably be glad you split up.
Now, I’m not saying you need to make your life look more fabulous than it is just to pose for him. But since you’re taking my advice and getting out into the world, it can’t hurt to post photos of you being happy. Genuinely happy, not fake happy.
Make him wait a bit before returning his texts and calls
When he calls or sends a text, you want to respond back immediately, especially if you’ve been waiting to hear from him for a while. It is a mistake!
Responding to his calls or texts right away sends the message that you are just sitting by your phone waiting for him to contact you. A good rule of thumb is to make him wait. These little games may look silly but they work. Patience is a virtue, and it will help you when it comes to texting and calling.
Give Him the Impression That You Have Moved on
Once he is of the view that you are moving on with your life and can see bigger goals ahead of you, he’ll know you were a keeper and that he’s lost someone he should never have let go of. That will make him miss you terribly and will make him want o get back with you.
Just make sure that you don’t do anything that makes him feel that you’re needy of his presence or that you’re desperate for him to be back, no matter how badly you’re craving it. If he feels that way, then he’ll think he has the upper hand and things will then definitely not go your way.
The best way for you to heal your heart (even if you do get back together with him down the road) is to just be patient and give it time. Your heart is an open wound, and you need time for it to scab over.
I know you want to rush through the pain, but grief has no timeline. There is not a single thing you can do to rush the process of healing. I’m sorry. I wish there was.
Whether or not you get back with your ex, you need to reserve enough time for you to process what happened, get used to being away from him, and decide whether reuniting is really what’s best for you. It may not be, and you won’t know that until you’ve had some distance and time to work through your emotions.