Being in a relationship is one of the most wonderful things that can happen to you. However, in a few cases, it might also be one of the worst things that can happen to you. According to some recent studies, about 20 people are either physically or mentally abused in a relationship every minute around the world. This statistic is quite astonishing, but that is just the reality of life.
There will always be good and bad people in this world; we just need to make sure that we avoid the bad ones.
Of course, no one knows instantly that the person that they have just started dating is going to be abusive down the line.
However, there are some signs that indicate the abusive nature of that person. If you spot these signs in your partner, then it is better to end the relationship in order to avoid future torment.
Here are some of the signs that might indicate that you are in an abusive relationship:
1. Controlling Behavior
When you are in a relationship, you are romantically committed to a person. However, it doesn’t mean that your partner has full control over your existence. Therefore, if you start noticing extremely controlling behavior from your partner, then it’s a clear sign that you are in an abusive relationship.
The controlling behavior clearly shows that your partner doesn’t respect your opinion and also doesn’t trust your judgments to spend your life the way you want.
They try to control your life financially, physically, and emotionally. They will apply restrictions on almost everything that you try to do normally.
If you notice this behavior, then you need to confront your partner and tell them they can’t control your life like this.
If they refuse to change their behavior, then it is better to end the relationship for good.
2. Keeping Secrets
There should be no secrets in a relationship except for some quite intricate personal details. A good relationship is built on trust, belief, and most importantly, transparency.
If your partner starts keeping unnecessary secrets from you or starts lying for even the smallest of things, then this is another major sign of an abusive relationship.
A couple should share each and everything with each other in order to build a strong trust in the relationship.
Lying to each other and keeping secrets will only destroy the bond between the two.
If you notice that your partner is lying or keeping secrets, then you two need to sit down and have a serious talk about it.
If it doesn’t work, then it is better to end the relationship and move before things get too messy.
3. No There for You at the Time of Need
We all go through ups and down in life. However, we require the most important person in our life when we are feeling a bit down. If you are in a relationship, then the most important person in your life is the person that you are dating or are married to. A good partner should be there for you to cheer you up or help you out of the difficult situation that you are going through. So, if your partner starts ignoring you in your time of need, then it’s a big sign that you are going through an abusive relationship. It is better to end this misery to avoid future pain in your life.
4. Extreme Possessiveness
Commitment in a relationship means that you belong to your partner and your partner belongs to you. However, it doesn’t mean that any of you owns the other person. Each one of you should be free to make friends and do your own stuff in your own time. The idea of getting a bit jealous and a little possessive about each other might seem cute in the beginning, but it gets pretty bad if it goes beyond a certain level. Some people would go to extreme lengths to prevent their partners to even to talk to their friends. They will demand answers for even the smallest and meaningless things. Therefore, if you notice anything like this in your relationship, then you are clearly in an abusive relationship. You need to take control of your life and walk away from this relationship before it gets crazy.
5. No Apologies
Even the most perfect relationships are going to get through tough times. If you live together, then it is almost inevitable that there are going to be fighting somewhere down the line. However, these things also bring the couple closer as they kiss and make up for the quarrel that they went through.
We are all human beings, and humans make mistakes. However, a person should be brave enough to apologize for their mistake. Especially to the person that they really care about. If your partner never apologizes to you for their mistakes, then they clearly don’t value you as much as a partner should. It is a warning sign that you are living in an abusive relationship, and you need to finish it immediately.
6. Physical Aggression
The most obvious sign that you are in an abusive relationship is when you are being physically abused. A romantic relationship is built on love, and physical abuse is the exact opposite of that.
The idea of physically hurting the person you love is the most pathetic thing a human can think of.
Physical abuse doesn’t necessarily have to be physically beating up your partner. It could even be afflicted by yelling, gesturing, and showing uncontrollable anger over little things.
It also includes physically imposing rules on the partner by forcing them to do things that they don’t want to.
Being in such a negative relationship is definitely one of the worst things that a human being could go through.
Therefore, if you notice that you are being physically controlled or abused by the person you are dating or are married to, then you need to leave this relationship for the sake of your health and life.
If you want to know more about how to understand and handle this kind of situation,
here are some recommended books from Amazon, to help you deal with relationship issues: